Friday, March 30, 2007

Last post about Indian Team in world cup, I promise!

After the Bermuda match, I predicted "The Indian team would make a comeback".

Never thought it will become this

:(

Saturday, March 24, 2007

The positives

Never late again to the office each third morning.
No more will we have to watch Sachin squat after he has been bowled as though the ball kept low
No more Dada's clueless looks as to how to stop-being-a-dravid and keep-the-scoreboard-moving.
No more Dravid's perfect English in post-match Press conferences describing horrendous on-match Performances.
No more Agarkar's run-up that reminds one of a Marina jog.
No more Uthappa's crisp hits that end-up as catches straight to the fielder.
No more advertisements that end in the second ball of the new over.
No more noodle strap Mandira blouses...

No more runs, wickets, run-outs, doosras, power-play....back to work. Game is over.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Monday, March 12, 2007

A couch potato's recommendations


Sachin: I wouidn't mind you failing in the final as long as you take us there

Saurav: Silken cover drives, dancing down to off-spinners. An odd failure against Shane Bond is ok.

Dravid: Find the gaps not fielders. Remember against the aussies in the final, Sachin and Saurav are gonna fail. Standup and play the innings of your life in the final

Uthappa: BTW did I spell your name right? Mate, you have got the strokes but remember its a 50 over game not 5

Sehwag: Vote against your inclusion in the 11 each time you are asked to, thats the best you can do for the team right now.

Yuvraj: Clean strikes, impossible chases, breathtaking catching, the odd chinaman..prove your substance even if not in style

Dhoni: Carib grounds are small for you forearms. Remember to take the catches, you are the keeper.

Karthick: tamizhan yendru sollada thalai nimurndhu nillada

Zaheer: You are not a pace bowler. Whenever you get carried away, remember the last world cup when you got carried away from the field as a corpse.

Anil: You are India's best ever bowler and BTW Aravinda D'Silva is not playing this world cup. Wipe the tail off and prevent nasty last over hero all-rounders:)

Pathan: Ask Wasimbhai, Munnabhai, Dawoodbhai for tips, but for god's sake starting swinging the ball better than the bat.

Harbhajan: Band bhaja gore log ka

Agarkar: No longer can you be pardoned as "wicket taking bowler", watchout for the runs you give

Munaf: Sock it in to them and when it comes to 1 run needed off the last ball, find that streaky edge to third man

Monday, March 05, 2007

Tech help desk

Email from helpdesk:

Sir,

Checked your laptop for the problem you reported.

Checked
a)
b)
c)...


z)


Everything Ok but not working

Friday, March 02, 2007

Home sweet home

From:

Weather channel, MTR me-toos, highway cruises, blonde babes, snow showels, Multiplication enabled shopping decision algorithms

To:

Ashes 1989 re-runs, amma authentic, bumper-to-bumper, churidhar cuties, baby diapers, care-free splurge!